It has been a long time since I wrote here. There have been many stepping stones and stumbling blocks thrown into my path over the last 3 years. Just when I think I have something figured out things tend to shift and I fall flat on my face. Things took a turn for the worst not to long ago and my Dh and I had to pack up and moved back to Carlsbad to live with my parents.
Let me give you some advice. If you are ever in a car accident and your lawyer pushes you to settle don't do it because you will pay for it for the rest of your life. If I had known that I never would of settled and maybe some of the doctor bills that I have had to incur over the past few years would be covered in part. Lesson learned there but hind sight is always 20/20, sometimes 20/10.
I originally started this blog with my mother, as we were living in different states, for a support for each other in the diet we were trying. Well that diet didn't work, I think it was called Kim kins. Then we tried weight watchers and that didn't work either. I believe its a simple fact that fad diets and get slim quick tricks just don't work.
We have since discovered Dr. Phil. My mother found his audio book why browsing Audibles website for my father. My father listens to Audio books while at work to help pass the time, he works graveyards at wall mart. She bought it and downloaded it and we each got a copy if it on our I pod and have been hooked since. The man is fascinating and intriguing. My mother is completely hooked and frankly so am I.
One of the things he talks about are the 7 keys to weight loss that open 7 doors to success. He goes in depth into these keys and why they work. I am right now in the middle of Key #2 I think and one of the things he suggests is to have a journal to write down your thoughts and feelings for times when your feeling low or angry or sad or any other time your feeling overwhelmed where a reaction would and could be bad. He suggests taking time out and writing down what is going threw your mind so that you can detach yourself from it and look at it in a different light. Then maybe you can discover why your feeling that way and take a different approach to solving the problem rather then just reacting. He also suggests writing down your thoughts and feelings for the day before you go to bed so you can help elevate any type of stress or anxiety that may lead you to over eat or binge. That is what I'm going to use this blog for.
I'm going to start with something that started about 4 days ago now, something that has me really scared. I am having heart palpitations. I don't know why. Its not a reaction to any medication I'm taking or any foods I'm eating, while I am on a diet, its nothing I have not eaten before. I have tried aspirin to thin my blood and taking my vitamins slowly, one a day, to see if any of them are messing with me. So far its none of those that I can see my heart just thumps, and it makes me feel out of breath a lot and dizzy some of the time. I really wish I knew what it was. Right now I can't afford the doctor, and the hospital won't help people, they can't afford those that can't pay because of the economy. I have to wait till my Dh gets his first pay check so I am taking it very very easy, no stress or exercise and being careful with what I eat and take for meds. Its a good thing I don't need the Ibuprofen or Tylenol like I use to. I have been in a lot less pain since we moved here.
My Dh got a job today, which is a weight off of both of our minds, as we owe my mother and father for the move and putting us up for a time. I am also reapplying for disability and fighting threw the red tape to get it. I need the medicaid, especially if I'm going to start having trouble with my heart. We will need that help in the long run too since I can't work with my stomach and back the way they are.
I believe that I'm going to start cross stitching again as I got some fabric from some of the nice ladies in my stitcher's group's. I messed up though and got 2 sets one from Rhonda and one from Carla, I didn't realize I put my Addy on both lol, talk about crazy things going one while we were moving, but I bless them both and I will be sending them some of my stitching patterns as soon as I can get em copied, they are such a blessing. What lovely people. I will be starting my monopoly board very soon now. I also have to remember while I'm coping patterns to copy those faeries for Jean and get those to her. She has been waiting for so long for them, and I haven't forgotten, I've just been so busy and then with this heart thing I haven't had time to get to the copy shop to get em done right.
I have been eating right for a week this Monday, and I didn't weigh myself when I started, but I weighed myself to day and I'm at 319 which is a step down from when they weighed me in the hospital last at 330 something. I think it was 339. Yes I know that's big but I need to be honest with myself if I'm ever going to stick to this program. When we are done with this program, we will have undergone a serous lifestyle change, but it will be so worth it. The goal is to never have to worry about calories or fat counting ever again. Won't that be nice?
Well I believe that is enough racket and rambling for one post. I will post more tomorrow.
Hugs, Love and Light
Tracey
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